Pedro thinks dolls are creepy.

Alternate title: Doll Collecting/Crafting from the View Point of an Outsider. (and by outsider, I simply mean someone who does not participate in any way)

Mia, Sophie, and Sally

If you haven’t figured it out by now, I like dolls. Something reignited my interest last year, and I just took off. I have that problem, when I find something I like I go all out. But I am also good at hiding it from most of the people I engage with on a regular basis, as long as I have someone to talk to/bother about it. That person is Pedro. I asked Pedro some questions about her thoughts on dolls and such, here are her answers:

well, in this case it's only moderate sarcasm, but I didn't want to make another graphic so...

Q: Define creepy.

Creepy can mean anything you want it to: scary, weird, sketchy, stalker-ish, serendipitous, lucky, very large, _________ as if from nowhere, sudden, backwards, gross, really salty, overly emotional, bright, monochromatic, mono tonal, damp, sticky, screechy, arid, smells weird, or at an odd angle.

Q: Why do you think dolls in particular are creepy?

Because they’re little fake people that never stop watching. What and why are they watching? GOOD QUESTION.

Q: Is making clothes for them creepy or is it the “collecting/amassing” part?

While it is slightly creepy to be making such small clothes for the little fake people, it’s mostly the collecting and amassing part, yup. I, for one, will never be tricked into giving dolls the right to assemble, not after what the quails did to me…

Q: Would it be less creepy if I had children (mine, related or friend’s children) to share the “hobby” with?

I suppose. I blame our Grandma and Mother for your obsession. They weren’t as creepy as you about it, maybe because they did have kids.

Q: What are possible consequences of being creepy as it applies to dolls?

What aren’t possible consequences! There’s the real question you should be asking yourself. Two words: water buffalo. Giant cracks opening up in the ground, swallowing people into the abyss. Think of the snakes, the terrible snakes slithering free. All sorts of rampages, sprees, and swarms, you name it.

Q: What was your favorite doll/toy when you were a small person?

My doll, whom I played with at an acceptable age, was Pink Girl. She was pink.

Pink Girl and Armadillo, loitering and such.

Q: When is an acceptable time to stop being interested in dolls/ when does it become creepy?

Whenever you start telling people you’re “doing it ironically” or feel the need to hide it from your peers. I think you fill at least one of those criteria…

Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, if the person in question is definitely a 10, how many dolls have they acquired in the last year?

It’s not about how many, it’s about how much they rule your life.

These are all valid points… mostly. But I have always loved dolls and at this point in my life, I sincerely doubt I will stop (wain occasionally maybe, but never end). But I can realize when I have a problem with something (in this case, when I start bookmarking not only websites that have sewing patterns for American Girl dolls, but also websites of doll brands that interest me). So I consulted Pedro, and we set down some ground rules. I won’t elaborate right now (because they have become very detailed and hilarious, you will soon see how Pedro likes to have fun!), instead just keep you in suspense, but it involves a rating system and “points” that I can use to periodically acquire dolls without increasing my Creepiness Rating (as we’ve dubbed it) above it’s current level.

~Molly and Pedro